✨ Liminal Space

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Liminal space is the uncertain transition between where you've been and where you're going physically, emotionally, or metaphorically.

And for me? I’ve always been liminal.

Even as a little, little kid.

You see, I was born ethnically Chinese and Japanese but! my parents are from Singapore and Hawaii.

And then you sprinkle on growing up in New York and voila - that’s one big fuzz ball of confusion of identity.

🎾 One. Big. Fuzz. Ball. 🎾

I went to a school where I was one of 3 asian kids.

In my grade? Nah. In the whole SCHOOL.

And so I stood out like a sore thumb.

Never quite belonging either, when I visited the “motherlands.”

“You look Chinese,” people would say in Japan.

“You look Japanese,” my Singaporean relatives would conclude.

Foreign taxi drivers, in on it too, would shake their heads in disbelief.

“You’re American? No, no, you can’t be.”

“Your face,” they’d say, with overly dramatic, disconcerting gestures.

I felt like a hot potato being passed around.

So, growing up and being liminal is kind of weird.

Not being 100% of anything.

But not being 100% of anything means you get comfortable with discomfort REAL QUICK.

It’s like being given a superpower, with special seeing powers into multiple worlds at once.

Being able to bask in the glow of uncertainty and in transition.

• Changing careers as an English-major word nerd to algorithm-loving software engineer.

• Packing up house and moving countries.

• Starting my own business and bidding adieu to a stable 200k salary.

• Buying a manual car without knowing how to drive it (and then having a Bumble date teach me how — a story for another time)

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Liminal space is the uncertain transition between where you've been and where you're going physically, emotionally, or metaphorically.

And there are so many ways in which we exist in liminal spaces.

• Pondering what’s next in your career.

• Discovering a renewed sense of self after a breakup.

• Daring to try something new.

Perhaps, you are even in one now.

(I would actually bet money that you are. 💸 )

What are the ways in which you can stay a while in the discomfort and call upon all of the vast, rich knowledge you have from past experiences?

Tell me. In what ways are you liminal?

Rooting for you,

❤️ Sarah

I’m running a “Make 10 Friends” Challenge in January. It’s free of charge and the focus is on fun friending vs stiff, stilted networking. Come try it out with me by applying here.

🎵 this song by Sampha which pulls at my melancholy, nostalgic heartstrings with just the title

🍰 the concept behind this cookbook, more than cake. It’s not just about the dessert itself, but so much more — the friends, the decorations. How can we go about being “more than cake? 

Start With Hello is a letter of quips, tips, and stories for the always curious. It’s written by Sarah, a coach, software engineer, and Sushi Go aficionado. I help women in tech fall back in love with their career and if you’re in a rut, I’ve got you - book a complimentary consultation. Have a brilliant day⚡️.